The right way to tell your children about your divorce

Making the decision to divorce is never easy. But it’s even more of a challenge when children are involved.

Fortunately, an interesting piece on the Huffington Post by bloggers Kathryn Murphy and Linda Solomon recently offered parents some suggestions on how to best tell their children that they are getting divorced.

According to the bloggers, one of whom is a family law attorney and the other of whom is a family therapist, the key is to communicate honestly with children. It’s equally important that both divorcing parents communicate the same messages to their children.

The authors recommend that both parents be present when it’s time to break the news to children. Timing is important, too; it’s best for parents to talk about their divorce when no one in the family has any other events scheduled. As Murphy and Solomon write, parents don’t want to break this news to their children 15 minutes before a soccer game or violin recital.

Parents should also know exactly what they are going to say to their children. Just as important, parents need to decide what they are not going to say.

Interestingly, Murphy and Solomon advise parents to practice this conversation with each other before they go to their children. They also recommend that parents be as direct as possible, perhaps starting the discussion with, “We have decided to get a divorce.”

Divorcing parents need to be ready for some emotional responses from their children, Murphy and Solomon write. Many children will become angry, while others will break into tears. Parents must have a plan to react to either scenario.

Divorce is painful for children. That’s simply a fact. But, as Solomon and Murphy write, parents can ease this pain by communicating openly and honestly with their children.

Stay tuned for updates from our Ft. Worth family law blog …

To learn more about dissolution of marriage, child custody, or other divorce-related issues, contact an experienced and skilled legal professional.

This post is for informational purposes only and is not to be construed as legal advice.


The Huffington Post, “How to Tell Your Children You Are Getting Divorced: 5 Tips” March 3, 2012